Is stress a status symbol?
We have been talking a lot about stress lately—both on the blog and on the podcast. Somehow stress seems to appear everywhere we look. Stress can be many things and can appear in many forms, and stress is not inherently bad. What is bad is when you’re under some form of chronic stress, which you're unable to recover from. The “fight or flight” stress response is a necessary and sometimes lifesaving state of body and mind—but we’re not designed to stay in that state all the time. Modern life, however, seems to be coaxing us into spending more time in that state than is healthy for us.
Who is to blame for this development? Big business? Society? Technology? Ultimately, it doesn’t matter. The fact is stress has infected every level of our lives and we need to address it from many different angles. The one we’re looking at today is personal ambition and how you measure how well you’re doing.
It seems like stress has become somewhat of a status symbol. Many of us equate being busy with having a successful and meaningful life. But is being busy, generating lots of “likes” on social media, or earning more money the way to a meaningful life? It’s a hard question and one which probably needs more than one blog post. Most of us need something to strive for, or something worthwhile to aim at. Setting goals or working on bettering yourself brings purpose to your life, but it’s not the full picture—not even close. So why is it that we desire this busy and externally validated lifestyle? We have been talking a bit about this topic lately and it reminds us of what the German sociologist Max Weber wrote more than 100 years ago in his famous book The Protestant Ethic and the Spirit of Capitalism.
Your forefathers went to church for validation—not directly to God himself—but the church. Luther and the protestant revolution changed this dynamic and cut out the middleman—now anyone could have a personal relationship with God—which seems to be a good thing right? Weber argues that this is the birth of capitalism—that in the absence of a religious authority, people started looking for other signs that they were saved. Success and validation became the new gold standard, and we have been chasing it ever since.
Are we doing what Weber predicted and looking for external validation? Seems to us that Weber was on to something—but if we take a step back and assess our current way of life, then the question becomes something like: "What is a life that is worthwhile?”
Well… We’re pretty sure that “likes” and an insanely busy schedule are not the end goals for most people. We think that most people should pull the plug on social media and what “culture” is whispering in your ear. Spend some time with your thoughts and listen to your inner voice—meditation, walks, or gardening are great ways of disconnecting from the expectations of society and reconnecting with your inner voice.
Look and see if you can find some intrinsic motivations that you find encouraging. Do work that you believe in and that makes you feel proud at the end of the day. Instead of going for “likes” on social media, concentrate on the satisfaction of adding to a body of work—your life’s work. Don’t learn the piano because it makes you look cool—do it if you find it worthwhile on a personal level. Spend time with family, friends, and doing that thing you’ve always wanted to do. Follow your bliss.
Being busy and being validated are not bad, but see them more like a side effect of following your passions, and not as the end goal itself.
Slow down and find your inner voice, it will tell you what is worthwhile.
Until next time,
Scott and Lennart