Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes
We humans tend to not like change. An unexpected change in work status, health status, or relationship status can feel like it throws your whole life into some dreaded, unescapable purgatory. The maddening thing is change is the one constant in life. It is one of the few things we can really count on: Things will change. The good news is, this is also true when things seem at their worst. When we take a look around our life, and we don’t like what we see, we can be comforted by the notion that things will change.
It’s easy to try and throw a pop psychology band-aid on a bad situation, especially when trying to comfort others. “One door closes, another one opens,” “God’s doing for you what you couldn’t do for yourself,” etc. We think these aphorisms hold a lot of truth, but they have gotten a bit worn out from use over the years.
We have some dramatic experience in this area (unexpected heart attack, unexpected injuries) and we have found that the feeling that we’re drowning in a sea of change really is a great thing. We humans tend to identify ourselves with our work, or our partners and families, and most certainly with our own bodies. What happens when one of these heavily identifiable features gets taken away or is dramatically altered? We have found these times to be a tremendous gift. Not so much for the new stuff these losses make room for, but for the valuable experience of necessarily turning inward.
When we have lost something so precious to us–something that we identify ourselves with so much–we have to turn inward. We have to let go of what the physical world has to offer, and find out what we’re made of inside. This spirit within is actually the one thing that never can change. It is something that is always with us, no matter what the circumstances. If you have not read Viktor Frankel’s “Man’s Search for Meaning,” it is essential “life-change-chaos” reading. In it Frankel describes how he found meaning in the harsh existence of Hitler’s concentration camps by connecting to his own spirit and the spirit of others.
This journey inward is available to all of us. And we don’t have to wait until things get bad. Pick up a spiritual book to work through. We are always in the midst of one. Change is coming–so build that muscle of turning inward whenever you can. Then when life inexplicably takes a left turn, you’ve done your homework. All spiritual books through the ages have some basic lessons in common–recognize the spirit inside of you and cultivate a relationship with it, live a life of service to others, and let love be your guiding principle.
Developing your identity first and foremost as this idea of you as a spiritual being, protects you from latching your happiness to life’s wins or losses. It’s a way of appreciating and embracing life’s ch-ch-ch-ch-changes.
Until next time
Scott and Lennart